If you jump I'll break your fall

[Filter: Private]

Ryan...

No matter how stupid and annoying he was, even if I wanted to smack him more than anything sometimes, he was still a friend. During all the business in Colndor, he was one of the people who kept me from completely losing it. Him and Ken and Joey and Jeremy, Brienne, June...they were like my second family. All those games of cards and Cat's Cradle, all the stories and jokes and drinks we shared.

We were never invincible, but I never thought one of us could die. Then again I never thought Corrina would die, and look how that turned out. ...Dragons, after she died I promised to take care of everyone important to me. If it weren't for my stupid arm...maybe I could've gone with them, I could've helped them or...no, probably not. It would've ended up the same no matter what.

...I'll miss you, you big idiot. You and all your annoying habits and stupid comments.

[Filter: Allison]

...we're really a part of this. It's been true for so long now but it still all feels like some horrible dream.

I just want this to be over quickly. I'll do everything I can do serve Dentoria in its time of need, but I still wish this wasn't happening.

[Filter: Mom and Robin]

I know you don't write in here anymore, but just in case. If either of you are still here, please answer. Just...anything to let me know you're okay.

I'm trying to stay positive, trying to hope things will get better now that we've got Lord Kiefer in Mansoure and Lord Derek in Emeron checking on things, but it's still such a mess all over and I just...if something happened to any of you I don't know what I'd do.

Please be safe. Please.

shit

[the writing is rushed and messy]

They're

Dragons it's a mess out there, they're breaking into stores and screaming and setting things on fire and trying to attack everyone-!

Allison please tell me you're okay please tell me it's not as crazy where you are.

[Filter: Allison]

That was a lot of fun...it's been a while since we did our Festival shopping at home. I remember last year, wondering if we'd ever have another Festival of Leaves at home with our families...it almost seems too good to be true, doesn't it?

So earlier, for some reason I got to thinking about the puppy I used to have. His name was Patches, he was a stray my brother and I took home and kept hidden from Mom and Dad...of course, we had to give him up when they found out, and I wish we hadn't had to. He was so much fun!

Anyway! So what was your first pet, if you've ever kept any? What did you name it? Did you have to hide them from your parents?

[Filter: Allison]

Can you believe it? All this time we've been wondering if we'll ever see home again, and now we're almost there...I won't lie, I'm still worried about leaving Lady Elthea to her own devices out there, but I'm not one to question Lord Hasten. And I'm definitely not gonna complain about finally getting back home.

[Filter: Private]

She would pick now to run away, wouldn't she. We were almost home, and now who knows how long it'll take to find the little wretch? If I could go back in time, I'd never have...no, she still would've found a way to cause this much trouble even if Allison and I hadn't felt any compassion for her. You think you know a person...

I wish Robin was still writing in here. I could go for some news from home, or a silly joke...anything but this.

[Filter: Private]

You both think you're being so discreet, but even Brienne can see what's going on by now. Jeremy looking at her with such unabashed pity, Lady Elthea probably wondering how she can use that to her advantage...she's still too quiet, but I know what must be going through her head.

If only there was some way to get through to Jeremy that he's being manipulated. But of course he'll never listen to me, I'm just biased because I was dumb enough to be tricked by her more than once. Yes, and that's how I know she's trying to trick you, you idiot!

Ryan says I should be glad I'm not the one in hot water for once, but that's not even the point. Lady Elthea is dangerous, if things go awry with her again who knows what could happen?

[Filter: Allison]

Hey...I'm feeling okay now. Well, better, anyway. Sorry I worried you like that.

How about you? How've you been holding up?